I have a paper due tomorrow and I can't seem to get my thoughts together. Maybe it's because I know I'm working in San Francisco next weekend and I have so much to do before I fly out on Friday morning before the sun comes up. There are only so many directions this brain of mine can travel in one evening. I know I used to rock one baby in one arm, be changing the diaper of his brother, be stirring the morning oatmeal with a free hand and simultaneously letting the dog out for his morning poop. All this I swear to you I did and still managed to remain......well....haggard, worn, stressed and more than a little sensitive to comments like, "so what do you stay-at-home moms DO all day??"
So I'm sitting here a lifetime later, haggard, worn and stressed and there is not a baby or a pooping dog in sight. I'm Nair'ing my upper lip because the goofy little chick who works at my nail place said to me "You want wax? We do lips? You look like boy!" and god help me, I don't want to "look like boy!!!" not with the demand for haggard, worn, stressed divorced chicks with wrinkles and itsy bitsy bank accounts such as it is. And I'm trying to figurer out this paper. And I'm also paying some bills online.
How tough should it be? Outline the paper, fill in around the points and wrap it all up with a nice conclusion? Log on to the power company website, enter my username and password, enter the amount...click and a click and a credit card and double click...............all the while, making a list on a yellow legal pad of all the things I need to take with me to San Fran.
Well. You want to know what happened? Ok I'll tell you what happened. I burnt my lip. It's all red and puffy and swollen. Now I "look like boy who got hit with baseball on upper lip". And simultaneously I can't seem to even get points A and B to make one bit of sense for this research paper, thus there IS no research paper. And for the reasonable service charge of $4.75 I just paid the power company a total of 80 cents. That's right. I paid them EIGHTY CENTS and they charged me FOUR DOLLARS AND SEVENTY FIVE CENTS for the privilege of paying on line. Intending to pay them the full $80 bucks I owed them, I entered 8 and I entered 0 and didn't think to check for decimal points and stuff.
DID I see the disclaimer at the last moment that said something along the lines of "Warning, please be aware once you click "Approve" your payment can NOT be changed......"
Well yes. Fleetingly, yes I did see it. I saw it and I totally ignored it because I was wiping Nair off my damn lip at the time and I was watching Shawn Johnson kick ass on Dancing with the Stars and my cat was throwing up a leftover chocolate cupcake into one of my suede clogs and I just sort of spontaneously clicked which is what haggard, worn and stressed women do when they are multitasking and watching recycled cupcake fill their favorite shoes. Thus, I paid the power company 80 cents.
Yes, of course I can log back on and pay the $79.20 balance now due.
For another service charge???? Helllllllllllllllll no and can I get an AMEN from anyone to that???
I'm tired. Shawn did a nice job. Well heck of course she did a nice job...easy for her, she's young and adorable and has leg muscles that could squeeze open a coconut. Might as well face it, this paper just is NOT going to happen tonight and they're gonna shut my power off anyway, might as well go to bed...at least it'll be dark.
Tomorrow will be brand new day full of lovely possibilities.
2 comments:
I have to tell you this is probably the funniest post I have ever ever read! Because honestly I have had days like this. I often think. If they could just film what a stinkin mess I am then maybe they could study it and find a cure!
((((hugs))) Tomorrow WILL be a better day, and I honestly would take that payment into the power company in pennies! It would be worth it to see them count it out!
Multi-tasking is an evil concept, if you ask me! Hope things were bright and beautiful the next day!
The security word for this comment is "pandas." Wonder what that means?
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