Saturday, November 29, 2014

Bad Jokes


It's decided.
Christmas this year will be
the self-indulgent purchase
of a brand new knee.
 
My early thanks to my health insurance carrier
for getting into the spirit of things.
 
It's the first time I've ever been presented with a holiday gift
that required bloodwork, a mountain-size deductible
and a co-pay which would finance food on the table
for every child in several small
third-world countries.
 
Nonetheless, I'm grateful.
And I think my loved ones will understand.
 
Nothing says "Awww, honey....you mean the world to me!" like
a poorly delivered bad joke accompanied by a
hug that makes your eyeballs pop out.
 
That's what they're all gettin' for Christmas this year
from this arthritic Ms. Claus.

 
Presented by me
 not likely to be in a Santa suit.....
but definitely pushing a walker
wrapped in bandages all up and down my leg
and probably just slightly high
on pain killers.
 
Ho! Ho! Ho!
 


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