Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Gratitude Overcomes


Christmas Eve.
 
I spent the whole day looking forward to a really wonderful evening.
Had a great time fussing over stuff all day today
getting ready for
candlelight church service
and a really lovely evening to follow.
 
If you believe
as I do
what Ernest Hemingway said......
 
 
then my full measure of fun
and the anticipation that warmed my day
were the most important part.
 
So I'll just focus on those.
And be thankful
for all these good
and beautiful things
I've managed to find
to enjoy
and appreciate
this evening.
 
 
It's beyond cozy in here tonight.
While the harsh daylight always points fingers
straight at all the projects
that beg for my attention
the night
cares more for me
shading all those sharp
edges
and warming me while I sit
wrapped up in my blanket.
 
 
I found out my candles turn colors.
Small deal
yep.
But it's fun.
I kept leaving the room
and coming back to
ask myself
I don't remember those being red
when I was in here before.....
Well. They weren't.

 
Made cinnamon rolls today.
From scratch, baby.
Like yeah,
right down to the yeast
and the kneading
over which my arthritic elbow
is now whining.
Shut up, elbow.
We had fun making these
and they are quite
delicious.
 
 
I wrapped some presents.
While there are few to give
this year
it's fun to have a little
something or two
to wrap
and have sitting around
looking all merry and stuff.
( I find red bows
to be cheerful and hopelessly merry. )

 
First time I lit a fire
in the fireplace
and I'll be darned
if I haven't had to call
the fire department
and I'm not dead of
smoke inhalation.
We still remember
how to get a blaze going.
No gas jets, people.
No way.
Made my own little
fire-starters today
with a $2.00 bag of cotton wipes
and a bunch of old candles....
and they are AWESOME!

 
So at the last minute
this evening
the page turned
just a few short sentences into the anticipated tale of the night.
Never got to even look at the pictures.
And I sat here for a few minutes
feeling slightly...
ok, well a little more than slightly....
disappointed.
But it took about two minutes
of looking at the cat
and staring down the dog
and wondering why
I got all dressed up
feeling pretty
to look into the mirror and say
"Buck up, girl."
 
And that's what I did.
I reflected on Hemingway's thought
which I usually relate to life in general
but why not to a particular day
over which one fusses
and plans
toward the goal of a fine evening.
Why not.
 
So I recounted today's journey:
I got up early.
Finalized plans.
Went about the day.
Had a great time.
 
I sat and talked to God about the whole journey/disappointment thing for a
good long while, too. Why? Well, because I talk to him about everything.
 He pretty much said, "Cowgirl up, Deb." too.
And of course, he's always right.
I love that about him.
 
Fact: It was a good day. 
I had a fine and wonderful time right up to the moment
it all fell apart.
The journey was good.
There will be other destinations
and evenings
and plans
fulfilled
and disappointments
to weather.
The journey was very, very good.
So it's all good.
I'm good.
 
With that in mind
can't hurt to drop a line
to the old man
just in case
he has some magic left
for a Debbie
who still believes in it.


 Lights out on Christmas Eve.
 
 


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