Boxes on the Porch

Today is a very exciting day! Came home to find both the UPS guy AND the FedEx guy had visited my front porch. Two boxes to open, ohhh man I LOVE getting stuff from those guys.

First box. Ripped it open with a bottle opener. Pair of shoes! Yeahhh! That new pair of sandals I ordered. Pulled them right out of the box, slipped them on.......easy!



Next box. Bigger. Lots bigger.
It's my bike!!!! I ordered a bike a couple of weeks ago and it's here!!! I'm so excited I could spit. But this is a job for something a little more serious than a bottle opener. Nooooo problem! My craft scissors work nicely. The big staples holding the corners of the box together bend pretty easy and............

Oh.

Ok. Sooooo apparently you don't just rip open the box, slide out the bike and start riding it around the house. (Which yknow, is pretty much the way it works with shoes: open box, put on shoes, walk to mirror, admire feet, congratulate self on great choice....yada yada.)

Not so much with the bike.

Oh dear.

Sheesh. This is looking like some serious business and my happy face is starting to get sad.


Things always look better in the living room. I carry the various pieces in, prop them on the carpet and resolve to face disassembled scary bike like a big girl - with tools!!! I have some!!! How tough can this be..........there's gotta be a little instruction sheet here somewhere, I'm sure it's just a sliding A into B kinda thing. Five minutes and I'll be pedaling down the street. Now where is that instruction sheet.....................

Err...I mean, 64 page Bicycle Owners Manual and Assembly Instructions. This is the part where lesser women hiss and say "ohhhh sh*t!" Not me, baby. Nope. I march to the tool drawer and lay out my nice collection of tools.

I have a nice hammer, some pliers, five flat screwdrivers in a variety of colors and some pointy-pinchy things. And sometimes a big ol' knife and spatula come in handy, too.

Ok, let's tackle this baby and get out there on the bike trail.

The bike assembly instructions aren't bad. I think I can do it. But I'm up a creek, I have never HEARD of these tools. Spanner??? What the...or is that scanner.....put on my glasses. Nope, it's spanner. It says I have to use a 13mm spanner and I haven't a clue. And once I'm done with that, I'm supposed to use a 15mm open ended spanner.

Not to be outdone by a booklet of instructions printed in plain English, I take my study skills straight into the pages of the manual, highlight the unidentified tools and turn to my good friends at GOOGLE. What the freakin' heck is a spanner!!!???????

Huh??? Doesn't that have to be hooked to something like a handle or something? Crum. None of my screwdrivers look anything LIKE that thing.

Or this thing. So yeah. This is the part where I get sigh and say Ohhhhhhhhh sh*t.

And then, of course, I get a grip and do what I always do in situations like this.

I make toast.

What can I say, I'm a stress-eater. Some people pop a Zoloft, some people grab a beer. Me?

I make toast.

I don't know what I'm gonna do now. I feel just a little bit like I might cry.

I won't. But I kinda feel like it.

I'll figure it out.

Stay tuned.

From Wayyyy back when...

Went out for dinner with a guy I used to date in high school. He lives in Oregon and was visiting family back here for the first time in years. Had to grab pizza at an old haunt that hasn't changed much more than an occasional light bulb since the year we graduated. Even the menu looks exactly the same.

Best thin crust pizza on the planet, if we're voting.

Mike went to a different high school than I did. He played football. Nice smile. Laughed easily. Lots of fun. We used to zip around town in his little white car. Soon as we graduated he joined the Air Force. Although we've kept in touch off and on over the years, we've probably crossed paths in person maybe three times since wayyy back when.

After flipping stories back and forth across the table we did a little tour of the city and took a nice, slow drive through the Iowa State Fairgrounds and the old neighborhood where he used to play as a kid. Fun night. Unfortunately I was out of town on business nearly the entire time he was here so we only had the one night to catch up but it was a good time. He's a proud dad and Grandpa. I had to laugh at the amount of time we spent talking about our kids and grandkids. Somethin' so wonderful about the spark in an old friends eyes when they're talking about their kids and grandbabies.

Doubt I could convince my kids to believe it but some of you are old enough to know it's really true........the memories you make when you are young are even sweeter when you relive them with old friends.

Yup. Getting older is lots of fun.

Weekend in Asheville

I'll tell you what, I sipped myself into some serious state of Sweet Tea Oblivion this weekend. I have a great recipe and reputation for it myself, but there is something about the way a tea bag steeps in the shadow of the Smoky Mountains that gives that fabulous tea a most wonderful flavor. Mmmm and oooohhhh shugah!!!!!

I was in the Carolina's working at a wonderful place called New Morning Gallery located in Asheville. The region is known for it's artisans, skilled in all manner of traditional American craft. These are skills that have been handed down from generation to generation. The motto of the gallery is "art for living" and you'll see why as you move on down through the pictures.

The gallery features the finest American Craft work you can find. The wonderful thing is that it's not "don't-touch" art........I love wall art and they have lots of that too, but the store is filled with American Craft art which is functional, textural, touchable and intended to be integrated and used.....as their motto suggests....into your every-day living.

Take a walk with me through the place and I'll show you some really cool stuff......

I especially like fun, sorta odd-ball sculptural pieces. Lots of them to be found in galleries like this. You'd be hard-pressed to find a formal bust of one of the Vanderbilts in this place (although they built the famous Biltmore Estate in Asheville) but there are plenty of crazy dogs and cats and crows and............

......cute little pottery ladies with an attitude.

All over the gallery you'll find hand-crafted tables set with wonderfully creative pottery pieces. On the shelves are place settings of unique pottery and rows and rows of glassware. If you look closer, you'll note that the goblets are hand-blown glass. The pieces are all signed by the artists.

You don't find stuff like this on the shelves at Pottery Barn.

One of my favorite American Craft artists is Chris-Roberts Antieau. She patches her pieces together using wonderful vintage fabrics, outlining each image in beautiful embroidery stitches.

And more glass........

Could you set a suhhh-WEEET table with pretty things like this!!????

Ahhhem, might you please pass the crumpets.......

For a gal who enjoys most of her beverages from a blue Walgreens tumbler, just picking one of these goblets up to read the artist name on the bottom makes me feel a little bit elegant. And look at the kind of magic they create using their glass-work skills for these beautiful chandeliers.

Nice beak, Mister.

Brian Andreas is another great artist. His studio is in Decorah, Iowa and you'll see his work all over the country. I could stand and read the themes of his prints for hours. I picked this one out as a favorite this weekend because it reminds me of my daughter..........

I collect stars and shiny glass things that hang in my window and catch the light. Every time I work in a gallery, I choose another piece to bring home and hang in the window. I hope someday when I give them to my little granddaughter, she'll look at them and remember that Grandma Debbie taught her to love art and color.

So pretty in the light.

At the end of our first working day in Asheville, we were invited to the home of the gallery owner for a tour of his private gardens. I get all light-headed and speechless over flats of pansies and impatiens. You can just IMAGINE how much fun it was to walk in this beautiful place...all through the acres and acres of gardens are pieces of very unique sculptural art.

So THIS is what holly plants do in the spring..........

Because of the abundant shade provided by forests of old trees, woodland plants and hostas thrive in these gardens. Never too hot, never too cold. Never too light. And lots of moisture.

Yes, the garden not only sprawls for acres in every direction but it's also multi-level with little paths winding the way to every nook and cranny, many which have themes.

Inside the house, it's just as cozy and inviting. They really do "LIVE" the motto of their store. The home is just full of "art for living".

You've probably heard me say it before when I've returned home from a trip. It's true. Every time I walk in after one of these trips I set my suitcase down, look around at my own place and say to myself, "I've got to paint this place..........."

Busy, busy

Meetin' myself coming and going this year. Crazy busy.
Worked in San Francisco a couple of weeks ago. Good show. Great weather.

Just finished up a class that had me waking up at 2 AM and staring at the ceiling. The course was stressful. But I've gotta tell ya, I spend every Tuesday night with a group of people that I'm crazy about. Last fall we all bunched up together for a picture.

Three of them have dropped. The remaining group rocks. They are awesome. I just love them to pieces. So smart. So interesting. Great life stories. Next to the diploma at the end of the whole deal, they're the best part. At the conclusion of every class we go out and celebrate.
Wayyyyy fun.

Last week one of my Sar's friends let me babysit. Tyler is an absolute doll. Charming. Cute as a little bug. This is he and my Binks having a bit of a chat. You may notice they are about the same size. Actually they are exactly the same size. Yup. They both weigh 23 pounds. I think in
this shot Tyler is establishing superiority by asking Binks to arm wrestle......knowing he'll win of course, because Binks doesn't have the critical component....opposable thumbs.

Yeahhh for sure. He's a sweetie. Grandma Debbie had such a great time with him!!!


So tomorrow morning I'm off to North Carolina for the weekend. The folks I'm working with down there tell me it's sunny and green. They are enjoying a fabulous spring. Should be a good weekend.

Lest you think all these activites leave me no time for relaxation.........au contraire. Last night I had dinner with a guy I used to date in high school. He's visiting his family, in from Vancouver, Oregon and we had a blast at one of the old pizza hangouts from wayyyy back when. Took him on a bit of a field trip around the city so he could see some of the old neighborhoods and how things have changed. Soo much fun and I wish he lived closer. Seems to be the time of life, such fun to renew old friendships.

And to learn new things. My little sportscar laptop is grossly UNDER used by an operator such as myself and I'm commited to learning more so that we can deepen our relationship and make use of all of the wonderful attributes which I have been assured, will make my life sooo much more simple.

We'll see.

In the meanwhile, a few baby steps toward that endeavor..............and my friend Donnie graciously consented to be the model for my most recent Paint program exercise. I thought he would make a great pirate. Avast, ye scoundrels!!!!!

Arrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Great Stuff Comes in Pink Packages

Let me just quickly say...........this going to school and work and business-trip schedule is just about killin' me. And it doesn't help that this new laptop has a mind of it's own. The cursor is possessed and jumps all over the place, mid-sentence. WHERE IS MY YELLOW LEGAL PAD.....!!!!!!!!

And I'm soo soooo tired.
Thus I'll direct you past what has momentarily become something of a lifeless online spot to one that surely will fascinate you. My adventurous daughter has started her own blog so that her friends and family can keep track of her comin's and goin's. As you read, you'll realize what I mean...she's been on the road lots over the past few years and she's got plenty to write about.

This is my Sar.
She's not usually so....pink. Only for special occasions.



She's fun and I adore her. She's also a heck of a writer.
Drop in, check her out and tell her mama said hi.

www.tenaciousmakins.blogspot.com

It's H1N1, People. Now for heaven's sake, go out and buy some BACON

We raise pigs around here. Lots of them. The pork industry is big-time in Iowa. If you grew up here like I did, you know lots about them.

No. You do not get the flu from eating pork.
You can fry bacon tomorrow and eat it all morning long and you won't get the flu. You can stuff ham into your sandwich. You can grind up sausage and spread it all over your pizza. Heck, you can kiss pigs all day long and you won't get the flu.

C'mon. You know I'm right. Don't tell me some of you haven't kissed a few over the years and lived to tell the story. Sheesh. Who hasn't. My best friend and I laugh about the night I came home and called her after a date a few years back. Seemed to be a good guy. Met him through friends.

"Did you like him?"
"Yeahhh, he seems nice enough."
"Well? Are you going to see him again??"
"Mmmm...I don't think so."
"And why not???"
"Look, I know this is dumb but when he kissed me good night I kind of had my hand behind his ear............and there was something back there."
"Something??!!! Like what KIND of somethng??"

I dunno what it was but I wasn't goin' back to find out.
It could have been a bug for all I know and for all I know that coulda turned out to be a beautiful relationship but a girl's gotta draw her line somewhere.
And mine is drawn just this side of suspicious entities lurking behind ears.

Eat Pork.
Cover your mouth when you cough.

And you out there....you know who you are......wash behind your ears.

Mike's Swearing-In

A proud day for my son.

Multi-tasking and not so well

I have a paper due tomorrow and I can't seem to get my thoughts together. Maybe it's because I know I'm working in San Francisco next weekend and I have so much to do before I fly out on Friday morning before the sun comes up. There are only so many directions this brain of mine can travel in one evening. I know I used to rock one baby in one arm, be changing the diaper of his brother, be stirring the morning oatmeal with a free hand and simultaneously letting the dog out for his morning poop. All this I swear to you I did and still managed to remain......well....haggard, worn, stressed and more than a little sensitive to comments like, "so what do you stay-at-home moms DO all day??"

So I'm sitting here a lifetime later, haggard, worn and stressed and there is not a baby or a pooping dog in sight. I'm Nair'ing my upper lip because the goofy little chick who works at my nail place said to me "You want wax? We do lips? You look like boy!" and god help me, I don't want to "look like boy!!!" not with the demand for haggard, worn, stressed divorced chicks with wrinkles and itsy bitsy bank accounts such as it is. And I'm trying to figurer out this paper. And I'm also paying some bills online.

How tough should it be? Outline the paper, fill in around the points and wrap it all up with a nice conclusion? Log on to the power company website, enter my username and password, enter the amount...click and a click and a credit card and double click...............all the while, making a list on a yellow legal pad of all the things I need to take with me to San Fran.

Well. You want to know what happened? Ok I'll tell you what happened. I burnt my lip. It's all red and puffy and swollen. Now I "look like boy who got hit with baseball on upper lip". And simultaneously I can't seem to even get points A and B to make one bit of sense for this research paper, thus there IS no research paper. And for the reasonable service charge of $4.75 I just paid the power company a total of 80 cents. That's right. I paid them EIGHTY CENTS and they charged me FOUR DOLLARS AND SEVENTY FIVE CENTS for the privilege of paying on line. Intending to pay them the full $80 bucks I owed them, I entered 8 and I entered 0 and didn't think to check for decimal points and stuff.

DID I see the disclaimer at the last moment that said something along the lines of "Warning, please be aware once you click "Approve" your payment can NOT be changed......"

Well yes. Fleetingly, yes I did see it. I saw it and I totally ignored it because I was wiping Nair off my damn lip at the time and I was watching Shawn Johnson kick ass on Dancing with the Stars and my cat was throwing up a leftover chocolate cupcake into one of my suede clogs and I just sort of spontaneously clicked which is what haggard, worn and stressed women do when they are multitasking and watching recycled cupcake fill their favorite shoes. Thus, I paid the power company 80 cents.

Yes, of course I can log back on and pay the $79.20 balance now due.
For another service charge???? Helllllllllllllllll no and can I get an AMEN from anyone to that???

I'm tired. Shawn did a nice job. Well heck of course she did a nice job...easy for her, she's young and adorable and has leg muscles that could squeeze open a coconut. Might as well face it, this paper just is NOT going to happen tonight and they're gonna shut my power off anyway, might as well go to bed...at least it'll be dark.

Tomorrow will be brand new day full of lovely possibilities.

Whew.......!!!!!

I'm sitting here mindlessly watching Poltergeist II just because it's on. This is a very dumb movie. I know it's old but it's the first time I've ever seen it. Ok, maybe on the big screen it would be horrifying. Not so much this afternoon. I keep thinking, what a mean way to treat a nice little girl in cute red jammies. She should be having a nice bowl of ice cream and heading off to a bedtime story. Harry Potter is on later. Love that movie and it's just nice to be snuggled into my couch tonight doing not a thing.

My April roared in like a lion. First week Mike flew in with my little Victoria on Wednesday, Sar flew home from Portland on Thursday and my cousin Margie flew in from California on Friday. After a great girlie night we all got dressed up for Mike and Nikki's engagement party on Saturday night. Victoria was frilly and beautiful in her little black velvet and red satin dress and was prancing aorund my place like a princess. Grandma Debbie tried real hard to get that beautifully wispy reddish Welsh hair of hers knotted up top her head in a proper do but there are good reasons why we pay hair chicks to do that sort of thing. And her mommy is a fabulous hair chick! She's used to the best, no way I could match her magic. After a couple of false starts, we ended up with a very nice little pony tail with special-evening curls. Her little black velvet shoes and tights ("they're my PANTYHOSE, Grandma") were the finishing touch. It was pouring down rain when we left for the party. Watched the Princess dodge puddles as she ran with Aunt Margie into the party and made a mental note to email my best buddy John and thank him again for my favorite artsy-fartsy umbrella.

Mid-party the kids got on the DJ's microphone and made an announcement..........we have a surprise for you, we're getting married here tonight!.............and they rolled back a big, movable wall in the party lodge behind which was a nifty candlelit chapel set up. Nikki and Mike ducked out of the party for 10 minutes, changed into "Here comes the bride..." duds and right then and there, we had a wedding. Without the advantage of a proper wedding rehearsal all of the surprise attendants did a great job, including Victoria who accepted the official duties of Flower Girl with the royal finesse to which she was clearly born.

And lahh tee dahh and yada yada yada....I do, I do too.....smooch, smooch.....and we danced the night awayyyyyyyyyyyyy.
Victoria was right there on the floor, shakin' it with all of the other pretty girls. Click on the arrow below the video screen:

It was a fun night. An exhausting, perfect, fun, fun night. The next couple of days we spent just hanging out and having fun. Auntie Sara and Victoria spent some quality time together which included a 3-D movie that required wicked cool glasses.

Wednesday morning Victoria and I got in the car, drove to Omaha and we flew her home to Virginia where mom and Josh and Nana were waiting. I make this trip with her 3-5 times a year. Friends ask me if it isn't exhausting and wonder how she likes flying. Victoria is a seasoned traveler. She could give the pre-flight safety talk herself if the flight attendants would let her. And we just make a real fun Grandma Debbie and Victoria day out of it.

We laugh and draw pictures in the airports and we have fun on the plane.

This particular flight was not without incident. Earlier in the week, Princess Victoria discovered her first loose tooth.

She was so excited. She called Mom. She called Dad.

We watched it for 3 days and it got looser and looser............you guessed it. Somewhere over Michigan at about 30,000 feet the tooth came out. She kept trying to pull it and it was hanging by a thread so finally Grandma helped. And there it was.

I'd forgotten how tiny baby teeth are as I carefully wrapped it up in the corner of an envelope and tucked it into my purse so she could put it under her pillow for the tooth fairy. She told me that she thought the tooth fairy would probably leave her some jewelry. And cash. She was grinning and freshly toothless when the plane touched down in Norfolk.

I was sitting on the bed eating take-out Chinese in my airport hotel by 8, on a plane for home again at 6 the next morning, back to work Friday, helped clean at my moms house Saturday morning and babysat for some friends on Saturday night. (Are you still with me??)

Babysitting has certainly changed. When I got there little Aidan was already asleep upstairs and there was a little tv screen thingie in the living room where I could watch her and hear her all evening. As I sat on the couch and played with the dogs, I watched her stretch and dream and wiggle all over the crib, but she never woke up. It was the coolest thing!!! Watching a baby sleep on a little tv screen. AHHHHH-MAZING. (I'm showing my age, aren't I??) I was a little bummed. Never even got to hold the baby. But it was fun watching her wiggle and sleep on that little screen, kind of like a mini-movie next to the one I was watching on the bigger screen.

Sunday morning my David and his girlfriend invited me and the other kids over for brunch. Love it when the kids cook for me!!!! The two of them are a perfect match. They are both computer gamers. Although their dining table was cleared and nicely set for brunch, they tell me it's usually set with back-to-back computers and........as his sister tried to describe to me later this week........enough controllers and gaming props that it sort of looks like the flight deck of the Starship Enterprise in there. Over brunch he told us his job as a manager had been eliminated. He was offered a lateral position or a nice severance package. He took the package, he's got a plan, he's diving off into a brand new direction. Man but I DO love it that my kids are fearless. This mama was grinning allllllllllll the way home with her lovely Easter lily next to her in the front seat.

I spent the rest of Easter Sunday squeezing my cerebral cortex to it's maximum pressure all afternoon, trying to do my homework. I've got a B+ in this class right now and it's driving this A-lovin' girl crazy. Tuesday night was class. This bears yet another mention of advancing technology and my efforts to keep up with it. We don't hand in homework. We upload it. I know this will come as no surprise to anyone under the age of 40 I suppose, but it's a freakin' MIRACLE to me. No hard copies. No "my dog ate it" excuses. Nope. I just log on to the university website and UPLOAD MY HOMEWORK. If you don't know what that means..........well, if you don't know what that means you must be my age. I can't explain it. Somehow one minute it's HERE. And then after a few clicks and stuff....it's THERE. Honest, it gives me the willies just to say it. Like Big Brother is living in my living room...

Mid-week after Easter Sar drove in from Portland (having flown back after the wedding festivities and turned right around to bring her car back) after nine months living there, house sitting for a dear friend. She's in town for a couple of weeks and will be heading off to Tennessee where she'll be working as a counselor in an "outward bound" kind of program for at-risk kids. It's fun having her home even though she's got lots of places to be and we won't be seeing her much this visit. (That's one thing about raising really great kids who have lots of friends. When they grow up you have to be understanding and share them with the world. But I'll tell you what, the phone calls home and the postcards are great!)

Anyway, Monday I left work early, picked up Sara and drove North to a suburb to watch my son get sworn in as a police officer. Big week for him after getting married a few days earlier. Officer Mike is badge #101 and reports to the Iowa Law Enforcement Academy in a couple of weeks for training. He has assured me, should I speed in his town he will be obligated to give me a ticket. I have assured him if that ever happens I'll be so tickled to think he's my son standing there all handsome in his uniform that I will probably record the entire thing on my cell phone, ask him to wave hi into the camera and I'll get out of the car, flag down a motorist and ask them to take our picture together to remember the moment for posterity. And of course I will post it on my blog. So make sure that badge is polished at all times, Mister, yer gonna be in the movies.

This morning I got up at 5:30 to make my 6:30 AM Weight Watchers meeting. Had my new friend and classmate Janell not told me she'd be there and expect to see me, honest, I would have stayed in bed. It was a drippy, soggy kind of morning. The window was open. I could hear robins. The cat was snoring. It would have been so easy to just roll over and snuggle into that pillow. But I did not!!! Thank you for the peer pressure Janell!!!! Once I pried my eyes open and got going, it was a great morning. Got my hair cut and I feel cute as a button.

Now we rest. Seriously. I'm barefoot. Nothing going on tonight. Promised myself I won't even LOOK at my homework until 7 tomorrow morning. Feels kind of anti-climactic to tell you the truth, but next weekend I'm working in San Francisco so I suppose it's a good idea to just kick back. I can do that.

Just not for long, it seems. You'll remember I mentioned my buddy John earlier. One of his favorite phrases: I'll rest when I'm dead. I'm not going to wait that long, but I know what he means. It seems there is always just so much to do.

Gotta Start Takin' the Train.....

This sort of thing hardly ever happens to me in airports...........

Takes me back......

How many of us ran out and bought another Moody Blues disk after watching this commercial for the first time??